Thursday, 9 April 2009

a life you don't live is still lost

i've been back in singapore for over 2 weeks now, but i haven't had the time nor will power to really take the time out to put my thoughts into words till now, firstly, because i was ill for the entire week after my return, and then it was a equally hectic week in clinic.

my trip was thoroughly enjoyable, despite my initial misgivings about my teammates. my first impressions of the team setting out to kota serang was that we're such a motley crew. while i had no qualms about the undoubted ability of the team to get things done, i was really unsure about the dynamics of the team, about how the team was going to function.

and how i was to be proven mistaken.

i chose to go to kota serang despite most of my classmates and friends choosing to head to batam, simply because jakarta was where i could really make a difference with what i had learnt (we'd be screening patients of all ages, and it is generally a less well-off area whereas the batam team primarily screen children. also, i don't quite fancy kids.), and i was prepared to go alone if i had to. to me, where my friends were going, who the lecturer(s) in charge was, how much i'd have to pay, they were not an issue. i wanted to help, i wanted to do, feel, experience something that i had not yet done, felt, experienced and that was it. if my friends were with me, fine, great - in fact - but i was prepared to go my own way, to find my own way, the way that i knew that i could.

so right from the start i was taken right out of my comfort zone, and placed into a group of people whom i'm not familiar with, which could explain my initial misgivings.

but like i said, i was to be astounded.

not only were we incredibly able, the team was astonishingly balanced and gelled from the very moment we touched down in indonesia.

let me explain: when i said that i enjoyed myself thoroughly during the trip, i meant that i enjoyed that company of the people on the trip, as well as the Indonesian students whom we collaborated with for the screenings. everything else that could go wrong, went wrong.

after touching down in jakarta airport, and on our way to our would be accommodation for the next 9 days, the bus broke down. and we were left stranded on the side a of a road, in the middle of nowhere for about an hour. later in the night, we experienced the first of many blackouts in the next 9 days.

the government officials there were not cooperative and seemed more interested in lining their own pockets then the well being of the people who they were elected to serve, and the facilities and resources available to us were limited at best.

and there were a lot more patients then we had expected turning up (we had a what-we-thought-ambitious target of 200 patients a day, and we ended up screening on average approximately 300 patients a day, with the patient count peaking on thursday at about 370), with a lot less manpower then what we were led to expect. (the indonesian students were "requested" by the local authorities to screen at 8 other locations)

these are but a few of the numerous obstacles that we were posed with, and i'm proud to say that the very team that i had so much reservations about came through so competently and much more impressively, and predominantly, we came through as a team through and through, with the sense of camaraderie tangible.

also, the indonesian students were responsible for shaping the trip into what it was, both categorically delightful, successful, and thus, rewarding. they were an intrinsic part of the team throughout the entire 9 days, helping us especially with the communication with the locals, and above that, delighting us with their sense of responsibility, initiative, with their friendship, and their hospitality, albeit in a different way that we were accustomed to.

we were worked hard in kota serang, and the food was different to what we were used to in singapore - everything's fried - and the was a perpetual burnt smell in the air - the indonesians burn almost everything, from their fields to their rubbish, and we were in a unfamiliar environment, and many of my teammates gradually felt the strain and felt unwell.

but i was well, and always ready for action - so to speak - despite operating on 2 to 3 hours of sleep a day, eating from the roadside stalls, working hard, and eating almost everything that was given to me (i'm not too fussy about food - rice to me, be it soft, clumped together, o hard, is still rice,and will be devoured accordingly.) that is, until i returned to singapore.

and all of a sudden, my body gave way. i just felt unwell, and the doctors too were puzzled. and i still had to drag myself to school to deal with the things that i had to.

and herein lies the lesson that i've learnt: do not be too quick to judge. the every things that may seem dubious, may yet prove to be the only thing to hold on to (as in the case of my teammates) , the very things that appear so different, may yet be endearing, precisely because of their dissemblance (as in the case with the indonesian students), and too, the things that signifies comfort and luxury and familiarity and goodness, can very well be the things that you do not quite need, and can do very well without.

matt,
14:19:00