i love football, i do, but i hate it when my teammates can't/don't quite play the way i want to.

that's when i get frustrated and i don't enjoy myself. even when i'm supposedly play football.

it's not so much losing that irks me, it does, but the feeling that you're not able to express yourself is even more galling.

but there are occasions of pure satisfaction with oneself, when playing with teammates and opponents of quality. the movement of your teammates already, where they know what you're doing, and you- them, with nothing so much as a glance and perhaps a nod, it cannot be described, a footballer's high perhaps.

but there too are occasions when, even with people that i know- with people that i've played with for so long, there is just zero chemistry. the movement seem choreographed, the passing seemed rehearsed at the best of times.

and i hate hate hate it when this happens. when i have to voice out and every single little thing that i want, and even then, there's no guarantee that it's be done the way i want.

true, there should be give and take, some will argue, it's not all about me, others will quip.

but why settle for testiness when there's telepathy, and triumph?

some i know don't. they don't play with noobs, and that is in their own words.

i would not like to go that far, but sometimes, when those around can't meet my expectations, i do feel that it's a complete and utter 'waste of my time'.

and that's when i'm blamed for petulance.